Taken from an actual conversation at approximately 11:38 on May 23, 2008, after partaking in a perfectly mediocre lunch.

Girl:Wait, you’ll be grounded?

Babysitter: Well, not really, like, I’m not going to tell my mom, but I’ll be grounded

Girl: You’re going to be grounded for babysitting?

Babysitter: Well, I’m already grounded, so if I go out tonight and don’t tell her, I’ll be grounded more.

Girl: So, you’ll be grounded for babysitting?

Babysitter: I’m grounded either way, like, I’m not going to tell her I’m leaving the house or anything. I wouldn’t get grounded if I were babysitting, though. I’ll just get grounded less because I’m babysitting.

Girl: But you’re babysitting, you won’t get grounded for that would you?

Babysitter: Yeah.

So, this conversation implies that if the Babysitter tells her mom she will be babysitting she will not be grounded. If she doesn’t she will still be grounded, but not “as much” as if she were going out to, let us say, a rave orgy / ice cream social.

I was thoroughly confused and re-ran this conversation through my mind before turning to Sean and asking, “Did you just hear what she said?”

His reply of “Greh?” did not inspire confidence.

But let us explore why she doesn’t tell her mother. Perhaps this baby is an illegitimate son of her own making that has been cleverly hidden from her mother? Perhaps the baby is a horrible mutant born of hellfire and alcohol? I guess we’ll never know.

This conversation just hurts my brain to think about it.